A conversation between me and Doug last year:
Doug: “We really have to take down this tree.”
Me: “Absolutely not. I love this tree.”
Doug: “It’s half dead.”
Me: “Whatever, Paul Bunyan. You already cleared the entire backyard, and now there’s nothing left but two acres of scorched grass.”
Doug: “Look at the branches on this thing! They’re going to fall on your car.
“Me: “I’m fine with that.”
Doug: “And when it happens, guess who’s going to be out there with a chainsaw? I’ll give you a hint…it won’t be me!”
Me: “Oh my God. If it falls, I’ll get out the friggin’ chainsaw!”
