“Here is perhaps the most adorable picture ever taken. This airbrushed, matted 8X10 portrait is yours for only $35.80, plus tax. If you choose not to purchase, simply send it back in the envelope provided, and we will douse it with gasoline and run it through the incinerator. Thank you for your business!”
“Eva, time to put on your…hey, why did you take off your socks? Tyler, help me find Eva’s socks. Anna, Mama’s coming. C’mon, Eva, you know how Miss Sue gives me a dirty look every time we’re late for circles. Where the hell did I put my other shoe? Sorry, don’t ever say that. Let’s go…”
And with that we sped off to preschool and sat in the parking lot wondering…why were all the windows black?
Today my father was reflecting on what it’s like to get old. “I still feel great,” he said. “But my mind is starting to go. Sometimes I’ll be talking and lose track of what I was saying. Or I’ll look for something and forget what I was looking for…”
Isn’t that one of life’s strange little twists? Fifteen years after I move out of my parents’ house, we finally understand each other.
Lately I’ve noticed a feature on facebook that allows stalkers to “browse friendships”—where we may enter any two friends and see every little comment and wall post between them. In other words, the creators of facebook have found a way to set up illicit affairs and expose them at the same time.
The social media is about to get a lot more interesting.