Today I looked at the speedometer and discovered it goes up to 130 miles per hour. If you see the trail of a silver Kia doing sick donuts in the Stop & Shop parking lot, sweet jumps in front of Bed, Bath & Beyond, and burnouts all the way through the Walgreen’s pharmacy drive-thru, get out of the way. We’re making up for lost time.
I’ll leave all further commentary to you, my freaks.
First pick of the garden! Never ever before has a piece of produce brought me such happiness.
This is probably too good to last.
Today I remembered why I never bake.
Once upon a time, I thought oatmeal cookies were health food. From now on I’ll just dip a stick of butter in a bowl of sugar and chow down. At least I’ll feel true to myself.