Butt Ugly Building’s Falling Down

As Hartford’s “Butt Ugly Building” comes down, I have to wonder if we’re giving it a fair chance. From low-income housing in the ‘50s to gang wars in of the ‘80s, right up to the conviction of Mayor Eddie Perez, it embodies the rich history of our capital city. Who knows? A fresh coat of paint, some curtains on its boarded-up windows, a spread of clean needles for the heroin addicts, and we could really spruce it up.

Colon Flow. It’s Everywhere.

As long as there are midnight feedings in this house, inevitably, there will be infomercials.  Last night’s presentation featured a supplement called “Colon Flow.” At first I was a bit disconcerted by the name, but then I decided it’s brilliant, and should appear in at least five more facets of our daily lives:

(1) in the subject bar of all political and religious forwards;

(2) as a streamer across “The Hartford Courant”;

(3) on every banner, button and campaign sign during election year;

(4) across the top of middle school students’ homework, which they completed at home, by themselves and to the best of their ability; and

(5) on the head of every Comcast bill, whose $99 a month promotion, after taxes, actually comes out to $143.57.

Thus concludes this portion of “Colon Flow”…don’t forget to flush!